first kiss girl kissing mannequin

Let’s talk about first kisses, because like anything you do for the first time in your life, it’s fucking awkward.

I came to public school when I was 12 after attending a very, very private school that made me memorize Bible verses weekly and wear plaid jumpers; the most risqué thing I ever did there was rap a scene from Sister Act during an assemble. Those girls were so holy, even the junior highers kept their skirts at the acceptable length and shirts buttoned all the way up (bo-ring); not one single uniform looked naughtier than the other.

When I transferred to public school, girls were reading Cosmo and talking about blow jobs and I certainly wasn’t like all the other whores in my class who were off kissing boys during recess, I was holy. I wasn’t going to lose my K card to just anyone. So yeah, you can bet your ass it took me quite a few years to come back to Earth from the holy belt and let a boy near me, not that I didn’t want a boy near me because the five members of NSYNC were all over my walls at home, even the ugly one.

My first kiss was in high school and it was so underwhelming that I would have rather kissed the dog at that party. I always imagined my first kiss would be monumental and with a) Justin Timberlake or b) with the cutest guy in high school (who is now probably smoking weed from an apple in the garage of his parents house) after I tripped and fell into his arms before he kissed me passionately for all to see. No really. Instead, it happened during a dumb game of spin the bottle and it was with one of my friends who had a crush on another one of my friends. The kiss was closed mouth, short, dry, boring, and not with a or b.

I always wished my first kiss at least had more tongue. Oh well.

Join me on Twitter to talk about first kisses. Tweet me @BlogWithBenefit using #BWBFirstKiss so your story can appear right here on this lovely blog. Spread the word people. I heart you.

Also, watch this video of Rachel Leigh, She's All That, Cook and Chad Michael Murray in First Kiss below.


  1. First kisses are usually interesting whether good or bad. It may be sad if your first kiss was not that interesting but then, you always have an opportunity to remedy that. The video is simply hilarious.

  2. I was sad then but now it's just a distant, funny memory.




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