Friday, August 3, 2012

The ultimate guide to romance


Christian Slater True Romance

1. Always, ALWAYS, have K-Ci & JoJo’s “Crazy” on hand. You never know when you're going to need to sexify breakfast up a little.

2. Please note that every once and a while, a girl loves to be tossed back and kissed like you're in freakin’ Gone with the Wind.

3. Be thoughtful, which also means pay attention. If she likes to read those romance novels with Fabio on the cover, don’t dress up as Fabio, or do if you two are into that sort of thing, just surprise her with something she likes once and a while (ie:” I saw this book today and I thought you’d like it” or “I recorded your favorite TV show since I know you worked late.”) I didn’t say you had to get her a Rolex.

4. Sensitivity goes a long way. Women don’t have the emotional strength of you men which means we need to cry out our emotions and sometimes be a blubbery mess. So when she's depressed/anxious/hurt/mad or all those things at once (ek, caution!), be sensitive to her needs, listen to her, be there for her, etc. etc. etc.

5. Flowers. Honestly, it's not cliché and they're really nice. Even the cheekiest of non-girly girls love flowers and don't believe the girl you're dating when she says "oh I don't need no flowers from any man" with an eye roll and two hair tosses. SHE'S LYING. Even if you pick it from a bush outside her house, that’s one more daffodil than she had before!

6. Surprise her: you don’t always have to stick to plans or do nice things on anniversaries, holiday’s or birthdays. It could be just because it’s Monday and you love her. Just sayin’.

7. Play with her hair. It sounds dumb but I'm serious. I don't mean braid it or put it in pigtails, just play with it in your fingers, okay? It’s sweet.

8. DON'T write her a poem, Google translate it into French and attempt reading it to her. She won't know what you're saying because your French sounds like a Jamaican accent with a lisp; however, DO tell her how you feel and use words like “amazing, best, beautiful,” instead of “#1, cool or hot.” The only exception is if you use all six of those words together. NOT.

9. This guy below:



10. If you have an accent like Pedro and speak Spanish fluently, never speak English again.

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Tweet him @PhilBrody or check out the book on Facebook!


6 comments:

  1. That seems like a lot of assumptions about women and what we want; do you really assume that we all have the same needs and desires? I don't waste time sitting around crying, and when a guy wants to talk about my feelings while I want to get up and get the problem solved, it makes me crazy...and makes me disrespect him. And flowers are okay on occasion, if you're already in a relationship, but mostly annoying and artificial; definitely not the way to win my heart early on or too often. Tell us what you want, sure. That might be instructive for some guys. But don't tell them that we're all just like you. The only way to know what's going to make a woman happy is to get to know her.

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    Replies
    1. I don't assume everyone is the same. You're totally right, every woman has a different personality, way of showing affection, wants, needs, turn on's and turn off's, and I'm not claiming women sit around crying every day waiting for a man on a horse to arrive to wipe their tears. This is just a fun piece; I'm no credited blogger of love, I just blog about what I see/experience/notice/view in my general group and hope I make someone laugh. It's not always on point: maybe I make a point, maybe I don't, and if someone can take something away from this, cool, but I'm certainly not pinpointing myself here to generalize all women. I know everyone doesn't demand K-Ci & JoJo and roses, even I don't. If I were making this about me, boy would this be a mess of a post. Trust me.

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  2. Yup. I pretty much agree with ALL these points.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Its like you read my mind! You seem to know so much about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.
    I think that you can do with some pics to drive the message home a little bit, but instead of that, this is great blog.

    An excellent read. I'll definitely be back.
    Also visit my web-site : how to tell a guy a guy buy

    ReplyDelete
  4. Jessica, what a sweet post!
    I laughed at number 1 and 10 hahaha I couldn't see what was on number 9 (my internet is very slow) but it was a good read in general =)

    Anyway, I hope you are doing well!
    xo

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