What does the opposite sex think about you?

Men on women and women on men
Photo by Jonathan Leder

I had the pleasure of sitting in on a group discussion about theories men have on women and women have on men.

The room was divided in half: men on one side, women on the other—granted there were far more women in the room—and we collectively came up with theories to share with the opposite sex as a group. Oddly, even though there were more women than men, it seemed as if men had much more to say.

Here are a few strong points everyone brought up.

Women on men:

Men hear, but don’t listen: sometimes the male brain seems like this: blah, blah, blah, beer; blah, blah, blah, sports; blah, blah, blah, sex. It seems like men listen to what they want and tune out the rest. Not all the time, but once you’ve gotten comfortable, it’s more apparent.

Men solve everything logically: this isn’t terrible, but men and women operate differently. Women talk. Women vent. Women talk-vent at you. We know. When said talk-vent moments occur, women aren’t prodding for answers. As you know when you try to logically fix the situation and women strike back.

Men have a hard time doing things when asked to do them as opposed to doing things when they want to do them: ah, yes. Some men are totally into working on their car, but when asked to do something simple like get the mail, they are suddenly tired, lazy, hungry, busy, sick with the flu, etc.

Men on women:

A female wants to vent, a male wants to fix (both sexes seem to have a problem with this one): a girl needs to know when to stop and who she should be venting to. It’s give and take. (Ladies, I kind of agree with this one: it’s one thing to vent about a personal problem, but when you’re just talking shit on some girl you work with, he’s hearing “blah, blah, blah and her tits are so fake, everyone in the office totally knows.” See above).

Women are too indirect: when men see something, they typically go for it or say what’s on their mind as opposed to women who say one thing but feel another leaving men to figure it out. Example: if a girl spots an attractive guy at a bar, she’s indirect about it. She smiles and makes eye contact. That is ‘come hither’ in woman speak. Men, on the other hand, are direct. If they see an attractive girl, their brain registers “me.want.girl.now.talk.must.” And so on.

Women are nurturing (enter women “awe-ing”): women have maternal instincts. When you’re having a bad day, they hold your hand or know what to say. They are comforting. Men aren’t as comforting.

Women are over-analytical: women have the tendency to take everything out of context and think too far into meaning when the meaning is literally right in front of them.

Women want build-up before sex: a lot of girls like that extra stuff before cutting to it. Men can basically just be ready whenever (rebuttal: women are chemically built different and physically need that build-up sometimes. Deal with it and be grateful you're getting some).

Women have too many double standards: women can call their friends bitches, but if a woman is being a bitch, a man could never call her that (rebuttal: if a girl is a bitch, you can break it to her softly; bonus points if you use a synonym).


  1. Wow! It seems like both sexes have in that discussion have a great understanding about one another...then how come there's always so much confusion? That's crazy :) Love this post!

  2. Wow, I... again... must be a man. Le sigh. My poor girly bits.

  3. I do love me a good synonym.

    I agree with everything that was stated, from both genders.

  4. So true! It's things that we all talk about, but we need to remind each other of these things over and over again.

  5. Hi Jessica!... I love, love, love your blog... it's so refreshing! Glad you friended me!

  6. the one about sex is so true. we can't help the fact that our bodies are instantly turned on sometimes. Give us a minute.

  7. Basically, men have to pick their battles. We're only going to win an argument or two a year so you really have to save those up for the right moment or our lives are just going to be miserable. That's what I'm resigned to anyway.




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