The difference between dating boys and men
Photograph by Ryan Lusteg

It’s more common seeing young girls dating older men today. No, I’m not talking about a 22 year-old-girl dating a 65 year-old-man (and if you are, trust me, the silver foxiness can only go so far until you’re having “lavish” dinners during senior discount hours). I mean a mere difference of about three to five years.

Money, fat bonuses and wanting a place to move into because he's successful with a penthouse can be lucrative, but that’s gold digger talk.
This doesn't mean you have to be wearing a dress suit all the time, I’m referring to substantial matter like maturity, which doesn’t always come with age, sometimes it comes with life experience (and no, not all young guys are in this category).

A man knows what he wants whereas a boy will date anything and everything. Yes, dating is about sampling what’s out there, but women aren't a buffet and life isn't The Sizzler. Deep down, you know what you want, so keeping a girl around for the sake of hooking up is asshole behavior. A respectable girl—you know, the one you’re okay with introducing to your mom—won’t sleep with you just because you paid for popcorn and called her cute. Anyway, all you're really getting from popcorn girl is a bad reputation and probably Chlamydia.

A man actually calls you or at least, texts you, as opposed to asking you out over Facebook. This modern romance is making everyone lazy. Oh, and animated graphic roses do not equate to giving a girl flowers.

A man is cordial, so after you breakup, he says hi when he spots you at the grocery store as opposed to ignoring you and telling his friends you're terrible in bed because he's bitter.
He is responsible and spends his money on real matters, or is at least saving most of it for those soon-to-be real matters, as opposed to blowing every paycheck on new video games and Taco Bell.

A boy is one person in front of his friends and another when you're alone (not so good vs. good). Cut the bullshit. A man knows the value of a woman, therefore, doesn't take her for granted.

A man doesn't sleep with you the first night (there are few exceptions, like, there's a gun to your head and you may never see this possible "love of your life" again) and vice versa. With exceptions aside, and he does, he really wants to know your thread count, not what your interests are. He also probably had nothing in common with you and after you sleep with him, you may never hear from him again, at least before 2 a.m.

He actually see's daylight on the weekends and has real hobbies other than girls and getting drunk.

A man takes you on a date that entails getting to know one another sans his buddies basement, red cups, black lights and drunk college freshmen.

He is independent and actually has a job, or is at least actively pursuing his career. Mommy and Daddy shouldn't be paying for your dates.

A boy talks about how many women he's been with too soon. A man is discrete: he keeps his mouth shut and his sexual health in-check.

A man knows how to do his laundry and he does it, not his mom. It's nice she does it when you visit, but if you're sending it home every weekend with notes on top of your hamper mentioning what needs to be dry cleaned and ironed, you need to realize she's not your maid, she's your mother.

These are indeed amenities in relationships. Who’s to say you can’t meet someone your own age—hell, maybe even younger—and fall in love? This is just justification for the non-gold diggers out there who are over their own age group.
Creepy PM's
To the dude with no shame:

Nice try but how many chicks do you send this out to in bulk a day? I just want to know who I'm up against. Also, do they look like me or do you just like to dip into the fish pond and see what bites?

Don't worry, I waited a reasonable amount of time before blasting you on the Internet. I also felt that I should blur your last name and picture, for your protection of course.

Once women see how much swag you have, your inbox will undoubtedly be flooded with a plethora of messages and I'd hate to induce extra stress on top of the letters you already have to correspond to.

Keep up the hard work, I hear people meet their soul mates on the Internet these days if you send enough of these personal heartfelt messages out.

P.S. That's not how you spell "hunny."
Courtesy of Revolver Magazine

For some reason MTV thinks the general public is curious about the lives of Snookie and Jillian Michaels, that frightening trainer on The Biggest Loser, at the age of 17. When I was 17 is a show following the lives of celebrities (statement to be taken lightly) when they were young.

Does anyone really care? I don't. They can't be much different from any other self-depreciating 17-year-old teenager who copied math homework, watched TRL and loathed gym glass.

When I was 17, there weren’t iPhones and the term Snookie sounded like something your mom told you a drunken frat guy would do to you if you left your cup unattended at a party.
After looking back on my teenage years and then seeing the new issue of Revolver Magazine, I was a little taken back by the cover.

Taylor Momsen, a 17-year-old girl who was an actress on one of those teenage mutilating drama’s otherwise known as Gossip Girl, left the show at the age of 16 to pursue her music career.

Her band, The Pretty Reckless, resembling something of a Shirley Manson style new age group, is just beginning to make its way in the music world. Taylor wears scantily clad outfits like lingerie, knee high stockings, garter belts, stripper heels, and a makeup counter's worth of eyeliner while performing on stage; since the age of 16 she has done this, at least that’s what we know.

With lyrics like: “you make me wanna die, I’ll never be good enough, you make me wanna die,” makes me wonder what the hell happened on the set of that Gossip Girl show and why, at 16, did she retire the show to pursue another career? Who does she think she is, Whitney Housten?

Taylor and I do, however, share commonalities at that age. I also wore excessive amount's of makeup thanks to my mother who neglected to hand me a towel before letting me leave the house.

I also seriously believed that I sounded exactly like Shirley Manson at times. Apparently I believed wearing headphones would muffle my terrible rendition of "stupid girl" that I sang over and over again in my room.

However, when I was 17, I was also sitting in garages with friends thinking I was "drunk" off one Smirnoff Ice while listening to Dashboard Confessional (yeah, about that); whereas Taylor probably sips Belvedere at The Rooftop Bar in The Roosevelt Hotel while listening to some underground British rock band.
I definitely didn't own a pair of stripper heels and I for sure was too uncomfortable to walk around like Courtney Love acting as if it were normal “sober” behavior.

The odd thing is that this cover comes two years after Miley Cyrus was wearing a sheet on the cover of Vanity Fair at the age of 15.

There is a vast difference in the tastefulness between the two covers so it's shocking that no one is making a fuss.

Is it because Taylor looks like Debbie Harry after tripping into Marilyn Manson's closet? Are we scared of her? I kind of am. She might clog me over the head with one of those four inch plastic heels of hers and I’m nowhere near secure enough in my adult years to be taken down by a 17-year-old stripper, I mean artist.

I think MTV producers are missing something. There's a much grander story here--in Taylor Momsen’s lingerie drawer and medicine cabinet--then there is in Snookie’s yearbook.

Photograph taken by The Cobra Snake

Let's be real, it's 2010 and most relationships begin by feeding the physical appetite resulting in people not really knowing one another.

To look more appealing, it's common that people leave out the gritty details of their prison record, how many men they’ve really slept with or the fact that they follow Taylor Swift's every move and have a shrine dedicated to her in their closet.

These particular components are frequently left out because who really wants to dispel information like the guy featured in the video below who wears a dinosaur suit to make a living and lives in his car.

“I would not tell a lady that until I banged her really good,” he said. “After that, it would be so acceptable [I could] nail her in my car. She would be cool then if I was good in the sack.”


So does a great physical relationship make up for questionable traits, a lack of commonalities you share with a person or in the guy wearing the dinosaur suit's case, being semi homeless?

Today, it seems as though there is a growing trend involving people settling with a person they may not be connected to emotionally but more so physically, especially after sex is involved. Are we that bored?

If you were sleeping with someone and later found out this person was one of the following: unable to spell words with more than three syllables, has no common interests with you or regard for yours, makes a living by selling watches from the inside of his coat, is immature, or the occasional asshole (no, it’s not Tourette syndrome like she says), would you continue seeing this person because they’re good in bed?

We all have Grey Goose to thank for many lustful encounters, but these days, we’re guilty of maturing these encounters into relationships. Eventually, you get to know the person; you sort of can’t help getting to know a person when you spend so much time together (which is when that Taylor Swift shrine is discovered).

So do you lure people in with your “good sex” and hope for the best?

The Man's Guide To Love #213B from themansguidetolove on Vimeo.

More thoughts to come.



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